Wish Lists

I have wish lists on Amazon. Browse if you want. Buy gifts if you like. :)


     Various lists:

• Lego
• Board & Card Games
• Books
• DVDs
• Music
• Random Stuff
• Video Games

I usually make these lists to remember things I want to buy myself, but if for some reason someone else wanted to get me something nice... well, I wouldn't say no!

Always Around

Album Cover Boxes (a new look)

I took some better photographs of the boxes, and I think it gives you a better sense of what they actually look like. Gives them a sense of dimension. D-I-M-E-N-S-I-O-N*

*The word, and it's spelling, bring back fond memories. Do you know why?

Crafty

These pictures are of boxes I've made. They took loads of work to make (especially with my wonky hands) but I think they turned out great. Made of old album covers, they're about 8" x 8" and around 2" deep. I don't think I'll be able to keep them all, since I don't have a lot of room that's my own. Maybe I will try to sell them. I think I'd like to keep a few though, some of them I am too fond of to part with. Do any of them catch your eye?

Does Not Compute

 

"Right there," he said pointing at a tangled mess of cables and wires, "that's your problem."

"You're telling me!" I said. "So what do we do, untangle it or something? Clean it up?"

"It's not that simple," he told me. It never is. This hunk of junk never did what it was supposed to, never what anyone asked it to do anyway. Lately though, I couldn't figure out what was going on. There was a weird buzzing. Sometimes some of the peripheral parts wouldn't function correctly. One time, all the images were blurry and doubled. There was a major malfunction, and this time it wasn't something I could fix on my own.

This guy, he looked at me strange. They all did, but at least this guy seemed to know what he was talking about. He pointed at things, poked and prodded, really got in there to check everything out. Special tests were done unlike anything I had seen before, so I figured at least I'm not wasting my time. Most places I went to, when I explained what was going wrong, the geek squad would do a once over and tell me I had a virus. They'd run some general diagnostics, try to upsell me, and send me on my way. This time was different.

"Look, right here. See the wiring? The casing around those wires, it's breaking off." I looked, but it was hard to see. "Without the insulation, it's not relaying the..." I stared wide-eyed, trying to understand what he was going on about but obviously he was the expert and I wasn't.

"You know that weird buzzing? This is why," he said.

"So, can we fix it?" I searched his face for any sort of positive expressions but all I could see was the look of a guy who had seen people come and go, day after day. Did he even know what he was looking at? He couldn't see all the fun times, the games played, or all the hard work. He just saw the machine. The wires.

"No, we can try and keep it from getting worse," he told me, "but there's no fixing it."

I listened to all the tips, tricks, and everything else he told me I could do to hold off the inevitable. "None of these things last forever," he said with a smile.

"But isn't it a little quick, you know, to be breaking down like this? I kept it clean..."

He stopped me there. "It just happens," he said with a shrug. "No one knows why. It could be the temperature inside. It could be a faulty piece from the manufacturer. I don't have all the answers. All I can do is give you a few things to take home with you, and you can try to keep it running for as long as you can. Just make sure and come back regularly so I can make sure nothing else is wrong."

I walked out with a bag filled with stuff the guy said might help. Might. I sat in the car, rooting around through the bag. More stuff I had to buy just to maintain the machine. No warranty, no guarantees, and there was no fixing it. At least now I know what was wrong, what causes all the trouble.

These days I go online, browse forums for tips, and talk with others who have similar problems. We compare troubles, trade stories and exchange quick-fix ideas. There's a whole community out there built around faulty wiring, which is a good outlet for any frustrations I eventually end up with.

The buzzing is still there. That never changed, and it never will. Multiple Sclerosis is tricky that way. It cause a lot of strange feelings, physical and emotional, that are unpredictable. Some of it goes away, but some effects stick around permanently. Eventually the whole thing will shut down, but until then...

Homemade Gift/Keepsake/Whatever Boxes

Made from 12" album covers, these boxes were fun to make, although they totally killed my hands. They get totally sore super quick thanks to my Multiple Sclerosis. I'm gonna make more, but here are some that are done. I'm thinking of selling them. Either direct or through Etsy maybe. Haven't decided yet.

These four are ones I absolutely love. Doubt I could sell them or let them go for anything. It'd have to be a big price, that's for sure!

More to come!

My MS and Me

(Note: I wrote this over 4 years ago for my Blah, Blah, Blah blog. Give it a read if you haven't already.)

I'd had episodes before. When MS first attacked, it made me tingly from the chest down. I had so much trouble walking! It eventually went away, but then it happened again a few years later. Only on one side of my body, but it included my face. That was strange and it made me feel like that Batman villain, Two-Face. Those times, my body was pretty wacky but eventually things would get back to the way they were before.

Almost a year ago I had my last relapse. It wasn't as bad as before. The tingling wasn't all over and I thought that was a relief. Only trouble was how much of an effect it had on my hands. I had trouble doing just about anything that required a small amount of coordination. Pouring drinks, holding a fork, tying my shoes... It was so frustrating!

What really hurt was struggling to hold a pen. My writing has always been clear. Fluid. I've taken pride in that. With such near-useless hands, I was writing like a child. Like a mental patient. I couldn't sign my name, not like before, and I love my signature. It was embarrassing to say the least.

After a few months, I began to resign myself to the fact that this time things weren't going to go back to the way they were. It had been too long, longer than before. It was quite a disappointing concept to wrap my mind around. There were things I wasn't going to be able to do ever again. Holy hell, that's one of the worst feelings. Total sense of loss.

Funny things happen though. Especially when you're not worrying about them. No, the tingling in my hands never went away. Slowly though I had less trouble holding, grasping, doing the things I had so much trouble with. One day, out of sheer boredom, I absentmindedly picked up a pen and started to doodle and write. After a few minutes I realized what I was actually doing and I was shocked! That was one of the best moments. Now I can sign my name again.

Recently I was complimented by a stranger when I used my credit card and signed for the payment. "It's like an artist" she told me. I smiled, beaming and radiating so much happiness. I may have lost a sense of how my hands felt before, but I've gained an appreciation for so much. For the ability to do little things. For the sense of overcoming what I thought were lost causes. For the small stuff in life. A signature may not mean much to you, but when I look at mine I see myself. I didn't lose myself.